Friday, January 11, 2013

Self-Control in Marriage

I found this compilation of quotes in my files this morning and....felt I was to share them today.  So, I'll type them up and hope that they will be of benefit to any who read them.  I share them, also, by way of personal testimony.  For...anything I post - is because I believe in it.  :) 
Heidi G.

"The gift of the Holy Ghost adapts to (our) organs or attributes.  It quickens all the intellectual faculties, increases, enlarges, expands, and purifies all the natural passions and affections; and adapts them, by the gift of the Wisdom to their lawful use."  Parley P. Pratt, Key to Theology, p. 100

"Self control means the government and regulation of all our natural appetites, desires, passions, and affections; and there is nothing that gives a man such strength of character as the sense of self-conquest, the realization that he can make his appetites and passions serve him and that he is not a servant to them."  President McKay, CR (Conference Report), April 1968

"There is an effort made in some quarters to destroy all idea of the sanctity of chastity.  In some quarters it is taught that the urge of sex is like the urge of hunger and thirst and should be equally satisfied.  That doctrine is from the devil and will lead to destruction for any many, any woman, any people that espouse it and practice it."  President J. Reuben Clark, DNCH, Oct. 4, 1950, p. 3

"The husband, I feel, must take the lead and recognize the importance of showing great tenderness, sensitivity, control, and patience.  President McKay said, 'Let us instruct young people who come to us, to know that a woman should be queen of her own body.  The marriage covenant does not give him the right to enslave her or abuse her or to use her merely for the gratification of his passion.  Your marriage does not give you that right."  CR, April 1952

"Sexual love, without the accompanying virtues, is not to be indulged, as it leads to evil.  God has ordained that pure and virtuous love should be incorporated with the sexual love; that, by the combination of the two, permanent unions in the marriage covenant may be formed, and the species multiplied in righteousness.  Pure and virtuous love should always exist between a husband and his wife, as well as sexual love; this will have a tendency to impress more permanently these heavenly principles upon the mind and constitution of the offspring; for the offspring will partake, in a greater or less degree, of the propensities and affections of the parents."  The Seer, pp. 154-155

"The object of the union of the sexes in the propagation of their species, or procreation; also for mutual affection, and cultivation of those eternal principles of never ending charity and benevolence, which are inspired by the eternal spirit; also for mutual comfort and assistance in this world of toil and sorrow, and for mutual duties towards their offspring."  Parley P. Pratt, Key to Theology, p. 164

"Young people should be taught that pure love between the sexes is one of the noblest things on earth, and the bearing and rearing of children the highest of all human duties."  David O. McKay, Treasures of Life, Salt Lake City, Deseret Book Co,. 1962. p. 67

President David O. McKay made the following statement:  "Marriage is a sacred relationship entered into for purposes that are well recognized primarily for the rearing of a family."  CR, April 1964

"The lawful association of the sexes is ordained of God not only as the sole means of race perpetuation, but for the development of the higher faculties and noble traits of human nature which the love inspired companionship of man and woman alone can insure."  Joseph F. Smith, Improvement Era, Vol. XX, p. 738

"Under the accepted plan the first parents were sent to earth -- Adam and Eve.  In order that the other spirits in the kingdom of our Father might be introduced to this plain mortality, Adam and Eve - and this is sacred - had provided in their bodies the power of creation - a light, so to speak, that had power to kindle over other lights.  Under the bonds of marriage, which are also sacred, Adam and Eve were able to invite little boys and girls to live with them, and they assumed the status of parents and became the father and mother of all mankind.  This process by which was created in Adam and Eve is given to almost every individual who has ever been born.  It is a sacred and significant power; it is a power that is good.  And you who are teenagers, like all others who are the sons and daughters of Adam and Eve, have this inherent within you.  This was the great plan that was to glorify and benefit all of the children of our Father in heaven.  And that power of creation is not just a part of the plan -- it is the very key to it, the very key."  Address to Seminary and Institute, Boyd K. Packer, July 15, 1958

"I have said many times to young couples at the marriage altar; Never let the tender intimacies of your married life become beastly.  Let your thoughts smell of sunshine.  Let your words be wholesome and your association together be inspiring and uplifting, if you would keep alive the spirit of romance throughout your marriage together.  Harold B. Lee:  Relief Society Conference Oct. 1971, Ensign, February 1972, p. 51

"We urge, with Peter, "...Abstain from fleshly lusts, which war against the soul."  (1 Peter 2:11)  No indecent exposure or pornography or other aberrations to defile the mine and spirit.  No fondling of bodies, one's own or that of others, and no sex between persons except in proper marriage relationships.  This is positively prohibited by our Creator in all places, at all times, and we reaffirm it.  Even in marriage there can be some excesses and distortions.  No amount of rationalization to the contrary can satisfy a disappointed Father in Heaven.  Spencer W. Kimball:  April Conference 1974.  Ensign May, 1974, pp. 7-8

"Brethren, we who lead the Church are responsible to see that you are taught in plainness.  I, therefore, must make reference to a matter that otherwise I would not present in a meeting such as this.  There are evil and degrading practices which, in the world, are not only condoned but encouraged.  Sometimes married couples in their intimate expression of live to one another are drawn into practices that are unholy, unworthy, and unnatural.  We receive letters from time to time asking for a definition of 'unnatural' or 'unworthy'.  Brethren, you know the answer to that.  If in doubt at all, do not do it."  N. Eldon Tanner, Ensign, Nov. 1978, p. 42

"As I struggled and wrestled to maintain my commitment to the Lord through the dating and courting period of my life, I concluded that surely the main purpose of self-mastery and consistent control over the drives and passions that have been so deeply planted in our bodies by our Heavenly Father, was that we might go into the temple pure in both body and mind and commence our marriage on the basis of complete and total virtue.  Since becoming a married man I now realize that it is true that one of the greatest blessings, if not the greatest blessing, in commencing married life is to come to the altar clean and undefiled in both mind and body -- however, I now realize that it is the self-control, the mastery of one's passions, that ends up being not only the commencing but the great ongoing blessing of married life.  To me it was really significant to discover that self control in marriage is as important as self control before marriage -- that everything we are taught about wise dating and courtship, that is, the sacredness of the body, modesty in dress and manners, sensitivity and consideration at all times, takes on even greater importance and sacredness after marriage.  Indeed, I became mindful that it is possible to be unchaste in marriage simply by allowing passions and drives to run unchecked or uncontrolled."  G.W. Pace

"As a man and woman share their lives with each other in righteousness, there is another beautiful growth and development that inevitably occurs.  Two people can't honor their marriage covenant in righteousness, giving themselves to each other in the spirit and power of the Gospel, making the Savior the third party in their relationship, but what they grow in a deeper and deeper endowment of Godly love.  In that love there is less and less selfishness, a greater desire to lose your life for each other, a greater ability to sacrifice of yourself, a greater sensitivity, patience, and self control, which enable the couple to express themselves deeply and honorably in their physical relationship with each other."  G.W. Pace

"I indicated at the onset the challenge of self-control in marriage; perhaps in appreciating that challenge we can glimpse some reason why the Church has been hesitant about explicitly elaborating on the intimate aspects of husband-wife relationships.  Satan, in an attempt to destroy the very foundation of life itself, has taken from the dignity, sacredness and purposefulness of sex by relegating its function only to the realm of self-satisfaction or pleasure.  The powers of procreation and the human body itself have been made cheap.  Satan has accomplished this in a large measure by artificially stimulating the appetites and passions of the body, and he has done that by exposing the body and talking endlessly about our appetites and passions.  The drives and passions placed in our bodies are of sufficient strength in and of themselves without any artificial stimulation.  Is not this at least in part what President J. Reuben Clark must have had in mind when he said: 
     "Parents are grasping at straws in an effort to hold their children.  The cry is raised that the Church needs a book on sex.  But what should such a book tell?  Already the schools have taught sex facts ad nauseam.  All their teachings have but torn away the modesty that once clothed sex; their discussions tend to make, and sometimes seem to make, sex animals of our boys and girls.  The teachings do little but arouse curiosity for experience.  It is said these courses tell enough about the generation of human beings to enable the youth, largely, to escape parenthood.  Books are written, courses are given about courtship and marriage.  To what point?  We have not too far to get to the heathenish abominations and practices in pre-Christian and early Christian times, against which the Lord again and again lashed out to ancient Israel and to early Christians."  CR, October 1949, p. 194.

No, this is not out-dated information.  The Lord plan is one eternal round.  True principles are always true principles no matter how or when they are presented. And, even in 'the whole world' is living another way - the Lord's truths are always true.  We would do well to heed them and to learn from them.  For, there is safety in obedience and blessings in honoring what we have been given.